Okay, okay, settle down! We need to talk about 10 Things I Hate About You on Hulu. Specifically, the things I *don't* hate. Because let's be real, that movie is practically perfect. But in the spirit of the title, let's spin it!
1. The Fact That It Ends
Seriously, why can't it be three hours long? I want more Kat and Patrick, more silly Shakespeare references, more chaotic Padua High! It's like finishing a delicious dessert and realizing there's no second helping. Cruel and unusual punishment, I tell you!
2. Heath Ledger's Charm Being TOO Distracting
Okay, hear me out. Is it possible for someone to be *too* charming? Because watching Heath Ledger as Patrick Verona is a serious hazard. You might forget what you're doing, miss your stop on the bus, or spontaneously decide to learn Australian slang. It's a powerful force!
3. The Lack of Sequel (Seriously, Where Is It?)
Hollywood, are you listening? We need a sequel! Imagine: Kat and Patrick navigating college, maybe even facing the challenges of adulthood. Think *Before Sunrise* but with more teenage angst and fewer historical landmarks. A missed opportunity, I say!
4. The Pressure to Recite Poetry Perfectly
That iconic poem scene gets me every time. But also, it makes me feel inadequate. Like, should I be able to spontaneously compose a sonnet about my complicated feelings? Maybe I should start carrying a notebook and pen, just in case. You know, for poetic emergencies.
5. The Way It Makes Me Want to Dye My Hair Dark
Julia Stiles as Kat Stratford? Iconic. But her dark, brooding hair? Seriously tempting. Every time I watch the movie, I find myself Googling "how to pull off a dramatic dark hair color." My poor blonde highlights are shaking in fear.
6. The Inaccurate Representation of High School Dances
Okay, let's be real: no high school dance is *that* cool. The music's too loud, the punch is probably questionable, and everyone's awkwardly standing around. 10 Things I Hate About You sets the bar impossibly high. My prom was nothing like that, and I am still upset.
7. The Difficulty of Finding My Own Patrick Verona
The movie sets unrealistic expectations for romance. Where are all the brooding bad boys who secretly have a heart of gold? I've mostly encountered guys who can't even remember my name after three dates. Thanks a lot, Hollywood!
8. The Fact That I Know All the Lines
I've seen this movie so many times that I can practically recite the entire script. It's a blessing and a curse. On the one hand, I'm a walking 10 Things I Hate About You encyclopedia. On the other hand, my friends are probably tired of hearing me quote it. But can you blame me?
9. The Unfair Advantage Given to Letterman Jackets
Why are letterman jackets so effortlessly cool in this movie? In real life, they just seem… dusty. Patrick wears one and suddenly becomes irresistible. It's a conspiracy, I tell you! A conspiracy to make us all buy letterman jackets!
10. How Much I Actually Love It
Okay, I tricked you! I don't hate *anything* about this movie (except maybe the lack of a sequel). 10 Things I Hate About You is a timeless classic. It makes me laugh, it makes me cry, and it makes me want to go back to high school (but only if I can be Kat Stratford).
So, if you need me, I'll be on Hulu, re-watching it for the millionth time. Don't judge me.
