Okay, let's talk about Optimum. And specifically, ditching their cable.
I know, I know. Some people LOVE having hundreds of channels. But hear me out!
Operation: Cut the Cord (But Keep the Wi-Fi!)
This isn't brain surgery. But it does require a phone call. Brace yourself.
First, find your account number. It’s probably hiding somewhere on that Optimum bill you barely glanced at.
Next, steel yourself. You're about to enter the retention department's lair.
The Call: A Delicate Dance
Call Optimum customer service. Prepare for the upsell. They'll try to convince you why you NEED cable. Be strong!
Politely (but firmly) explain you want to cancel cable. But you want to KEEP the internet. Emphasize that last part. A lot.
They will offer you "deals." These are tempting. Remember your goal!
Resist the urge to add premium channels. Remind yourself about the joy of streaming!
They might ask why you’re cancelling. Keep it simple. “We’re not watching cable anymore.” Short and sweet.
"But, sir/madam, what about all the channels?!" They might exclaim.
Just repeat your desire to keep the internet. Stay calm. You’ve got this!
Navigating the Internet-Only Options
Now comes the slightly tricky part. Make sure you understand your internet options.
Ask about any data caps. Nobody wants surprise charges.
Confirm the monthly price. Get it in writing (or email confirmation). Trust, but verify.
Don't be afraid to ask about promotions. They might have internet-only deals you didn't know about.
Consider if you need a new modem. They might want you to use theirs. Check if it is free.
The Equipment Return Tango
Once you’ve agreed to an internet plan, it's time to return the cable boxes. Locate your nearest Optimum store.
Unplug everything. Put it all in a box.
Prepare for another line. Bring a book. Or your phone. Distract yourself.
Get a receipt! This is crucial. Save it like it's gold. You'll thank me later.
Rejoice! You're Free(ish)!
Congratulations! You've successfully cut the cable cord (but kept the internet).
Now you can binge-watch whatever you want. Netflix, Hulu, Amazon Prime… the possibilities are endless!
Time to celebrate. Stream your favorite show. You earned it!
Just remember to keep an eye on your bill. Sometimes things get… wonky. Always double check.
You are now officially one step closer to streaming bliss. Enjoy the freedom. And the savings!
And yes, I know. Optimum can still be... Optimum. But at least you're only dealing with them for internet now. Small victories, people!
