Okay, let's talk about something. Something…shiny. Something…French. Something that may or may not have blown a hole in my expectations. I'm talking about Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets.
Now, before you grab your pitchforks, hear me out! Everyone seemed so hyped. The visuals were stunning, granted. But…did anyone else feel a little…underwhelmed?
The Eye Candy Was Real
Let's be honest. Luc Besson, the director, knows how to create a visually arresting world. Alpha, the city of a thousand planets, was breathtaking. So many aliens! So many colors!
It was like a kid let loose in a candy store. But, you know, after the initial sugar rush, you realize you're just surrounded by...candy.
But What About The Story?
That's where things get a little...murky. The plot felt, to me anyway, a tad thin. It was like a beautiful, intricately decorated cake with a really bland filling.
Dane DeHaan as Valerian and Cara Delevingne as Laureline? Individually, fine actors. Together? The chemistry wasn't exactly exploding off the screen, was it?
I found myself more invested in the random alien species than in their romance. Sorry, not sorry.
Rihanna Saved the Day? Maybe.
Look, I'm not going to lie. Rihanna's cameo as Bubble was…memorable. She brought some much-needed energy to the film. A glittery, shape-shifting burst of awesome.
But a five-minute cameo, even a *Rihanna* cameo, can't fix a fundamentally flawed story. It's like putting a tiny sparkly Band-Aid on a gaping wound.
And, maybe, just maybe, the entire sequence felt a little out of place? Like a music video inserted into a space opera. I'm not entirely sure.
Unpopular Opinion Time
Okay, deep breaths. Here it comes: I think Valerian tried too hard. It crammed so much into one movie. So many visuals, so many characters, so many planets!
It felt like sensory overload. Like I'd eaten a whole box of those brightly colored, overly sweet breakfast cereals. Fun at first, then…instant regret.
Maybe less is more? Just a thought.
Was It All Bad? Absolutely Not!
Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the ambition. Luc Besson swung for the fences. And the world-building was genuinely impressive.
The special effects were top-notch. Some of the alien designs were truly imaginative and original. You have to respect the artistry, even if the overall package didn't quite land for me.
It's a visually stunning film. Perfect for muting the volume and just enjoying the pretty pictures.
So, The Verdict?
Valerian is a beautiful mess. A feast for the eyes that leaves the brain a little…hungry. It's like a really expensive, really elaborate screensaver.
Would I recommend it? Maybe. But go in with lowered expectations. Enjoy the visuals. Try not to think too hard about the plot.
And maybe, just maybe, you'll have a better time than I did. Or maybe you'll agree with me. Either way, let's discuss!
Ultimately, Valerian is a film that sparks conversation. And that's always a good thing. Even if that conversation is mostly about whether or not the costumes were a little too…out there.
